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Elvan Escapades
WARNING 
28th-Oct-2005 08:23 am
Mittens
Warning: Harmful or fatal if ignored: A strategy of data driven social marketing, private/public partnerships and community planning designed to bring harm reduction efforts to the Pullman area.


Elel Elf DrPH, president of the Harm Reproduction Study Group.

Under the theme, "Warning: Harmful of Fatal if Ignored," the Harm Reproduction Foundation funded a public information and education campaign on the spread of the infectious Morlas in the greater Pullman area, especially repeat Morla users. With approximately one far reaching Morla user (FRMU) in the Summer Hill apartment area, the need for comprehensive harm reduction programs is vital. Using a social marketing approach, scientific data was used to develop campaign messages, which were disseminated via billboards, radio spots, print media, and through individual briefings of elected officials, community leaders and organizations.

The message in brief read as follows:

WARNING, MORLAS ARE HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH. IF YOU COME IN CONTACT WITH THE FRMU, STAY CALM AND IMMEDIATELY GO TO THE NEAREST HARM REPRODUCTION HEALTH CLINICS.

As a result of the marketing campaign, all but the FRMU and one individual that was “used” by the FRMU were captured. We would like 100% containment, thus if you know the whereabouts of the FRMU and victim, please call 1-800-HELPFRMU. This is of utmost importance since we believe that the victim of the FRMU was impregnated with a Morla Pod. If this pod is not removed before it ruptures, millions of highly infectious Morlas will be released.

Again, please call 1-800-HELPFRMU if you come in contact with the FRMU or victim.
Comments 
29th-Oct-2005 06:44 pm (UTC)
*can't stop laughing*

Wow... just wow...

That seriously sounds like an actual health hazard warning thing...
30th-Oct-2005 07:32 am (UTC)
Yeah, I went on a bit of a rampage there. . .
30th-Oct-2005 07:27 pm (UTC)
By the way, what the heck is a DrPH? It sounds like some sort of medicine. Try new DrPH hemorrhoids cream! Or...something like that.
30th-Oct-2005 11:44 pm (UTC)
DrPH hemorrhoids cream, that is fricken' hilarious! I can't stop laughing. I'll endorse it!

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